Letting the nice guy go

27 11 2014

My gosh it has been a while! It’s been a crazy year with more down’s than up’s for me, but I definitely miss being on here. And while I would like to come back with a positive attitude and fuzzy topic to chat about, what brought me back to the blogosphere is this article I came across and I had this urge to speak up. With 524k of sharing done, it’s about a nice guy who wrote a letter to a girl who hurt him. Here is the link: An Open Letter To The Girl Who Let The Nice Guy Go

You know what I realized after reading his letter? This guy definitely speaks very highly of himself. I’m sorry, this is to the girl who walked out on the best thing that ever happened to her” ??? If she wanted to walk out on you, she probably knew you weren’t right for her. Not to say that you’re not a nice guy, but maybe you guys just weren’t compatible.

“Still, he didn’t give up and every time you pushed harder, he pulled you in even more.”

Ding ding ding, warning sign anyone?? If she pushed you away, isn’t that where you should take a hint that whatever you guys have is not what she’s looking for? This is what bugs me with some of the guys. If the girl was being upfront with what she wanted, shouldn’t you know what you are signing up for? Don’t filter what you don’t like and assume that just because she is spending time with you, that all of a sudden you guys are on the same page. Fighting for her doesn’t make you a hero, or the romantic one.

“Then you walked away because he was too nice.”

Are you sure it was because you were too nice…. Has it ever occurred to you that it might actually be something else?

What I have realized dating nice guys is that they hide behind this “nice guy” title. I love that you’re a nice guy, that’s probably why I was attracted to you in the first place, and probably why I stayed with you for however long, but it sure as hell not why I’m leaving you. Being a nice guy doesn’t guarantee you get “love” right on your first try. And just like how you hide behind the title, we probably overlook a lot of things just because you’re the nice one. Oh you are not the smartest tool in the shed? That’s okay because you’re so nice. Hmm, you would rather stay home and read instead of getting to know my friends? That’s okay, your niceness makes up for it. Oh you want to be a busboy for the rest of your life? That’s alright, since you treat me so well. I know this is the reason why my relationship with nice guys went south.

Because of the stupid saying “nice guys finish last”, these self proclaimed nice guys just blame us girls when they fail at relationships. They think that because they are “nice”, they are never in the wrong, that something is obviously wrong with us for not wanting to be with them. Well guess what, sometimes nice just isn’t enough. That doesn’t mean we prefer assholes, it just means that you weren’t the peanut butter to my jam.